VALENTINES DAY

By: Nadyne Lee, A.R.N.P.

            Valentines days is the time to celebrate love, commitment, and romance.  The most important thing parents can do for their children is to build a strong relationship with their partner.  Valentines Day is just eat holiday we need to focus our attention on this very important priority.

            We find many excuses to rationalize our reluctance to care for our relationship.  We complain that we don’t have the time or energy for romance.  We say that the kids demand our attention.  We claim we don’t know what our partner needs or wants.

The following suggestions will help refocus our relationships.

            1.  Find time for romance and recommitment.

            Most couples spend 4-6 hours a day watching television and only 15 minutes a day talking with each other!  Try an experiment.  Turn off the television for one week and you will find 28-42 extra hours to spend with your partner!  Use this time wisely and you may be motivated to unplug the television for the rest of the month.

            2.  Spend time alone with your partner.

            Most married couples in Grayson County leave their children in the care of a sitter at night only 3-4 times a year.  To have a good relationship you MUST spend quality time with your partner.  Hire a sitter at least once a month.  Go out on a date or romantic getaway.  Trade evenings or weekends with a friend (you take her children this time and next time she’ll take yours) or ask your parents to invite the grandchildren for a visit.  Don’t feel guilty about leaving your children.  The best thing you can do for your children is to give them the example of a loving relationship between you and your partner.

            3.  Learn about love.

            “Love and Marriage” is the course they forgot to teach in school.  Now is the time to learn about life’s most important subject.  There are many great books able to teach us how to improve our relationship.  A few include: Getting The Love you Want by Hendricks, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus by Gray, How to stay lovers for Life:  A Marriage Counselors Trick of the Trade by Wolf, and 1001 Ways to be Romantic by Godek.

            4. Do something romantic.

            Watch a romantic video.  (the following were voted most romantic videos: Shakespeare in Love, Sleepless in Seattle, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Ghost, When Harry Met Sally, Dr. Zhivago, and Notting Hill.)  Go to a romantic movie.  Current flicks showing at the Movie Palace in Elizabethtown include:  What Women Want, The Wedding Planner, Family Man and All the Pretty Horses.  Read a romantic book together.  Suggestions are Bridges of Madison County  by Walles and Griffen and Sabine  by Bartock.  Go out to a romantic dinner.  Good romantic restaurants in our area include:  Whistle Stop Cafe in Glendale, Lilly’s in Louisville, Kolby in Owensboro, and Mariah’s in Bowling Green.  Or book a weekend at Rough River Lodge.  The Lodge is hosting a Valentine’s weekend on February 9 and 10th.  The weekend includes Friday night at the races, two-night lodging, and breakfast on Saturday and Sunday, dinner Saturday night and a Valentines Dance on Saturday evening all for $199.00 per couple.  Call 270-257-2311.

            5.  If your marriage is in trouble, get Help!!!

            Talk to your doctor, minister, psychologist, or marriage counselor.  Reaching out for help is a sign of strength and commitment.   It is not a sign of weakness.  Many marriages fail because the couple is unwilling to find help.  It is worth the time, energy, effort and expense necessary to rescue a troubled marriage.

Celebrate and enjoy the holiday!  Happy Valentines Day!

TEN WAYS TO SHOW LOVE FOR YOUR CHILD THIS VALENTINE’S DAY

By:  Joseph Lee, M.D.

            The following are some Valentine’s Day tips from the American Academy of Pediatrics.  We encourage you to let your child know you love him or her by the way you act and the things you say.

            1.  Use plenty of positive words with your child.  Nurture his self-esteem and self-confidence by praising a job well done, and show interest in what he is saying.

            2.  Help your child’s early brain development by setting aside time for reading, even reading to your infant.

            3.  Talk with your pediatrician to be sure your child’s health records are up to date and ensure that all immunizations have been given.

            4.  Provide safe transportation.  Be sure your child’s safety seat is properly installed in your car, and that it is the appropriate type for her height and weight.

            5.  Owning a pet can make children with chronic illnesses and disabilities feel better by stimulating physical activity, enhancing their overall attitude, and offering constant companionship.  Be sure it is an appropriate pet for a child.

            6.  Respond promptly and lovingly to your child’s physical and emotional needs and banish put-downs from your parenting vocabulary.

            7.  Limit the kinds and amount of television she watches as well as other medial she uses.  Enforce her bedtime and homework time, and have meals at predictable times.

            8.  Make an extra effort to set a good example at home and in public.  Use words like “I’m sorry,” “please,” and “thank you.”

            9.  When your child is angry, argumentative or in a bad mood, give him a hug, cuddle, pat, secret sign or other gesture of affection he favors.

            10.  Mark family nights on your calendar so the entire family can be together.  Put a different family member’s name under each date, and have that person choose what games to play don’t forget to say, “I love you” to children of all ages!! Happy Valentine’s Day!