STRESS MANAGEMENT

 By:  Nadyne Lee, A.R.N.P.

            Stress is as old as creation.  The first case of stress was probably when Adam realized he was caught red-handed with an apple peel stuck between his teeth.  We have all experienced stress.  We know what it is and how it feels.  But defining stress is like trying to nail jello to a tree.  Stress is different for different people.  Webster defines stress as “what you experience when you believe you can’t cope effectively with a threatening situation.”  But perhaps you may prefer the definition of stress I once saw on a greeting card. . .. “Stress is created when your mind overrides your body’s basic desire to choke the living daylights out of some idiot who desperately deserves it.”  (Perhaps it’s best to stick with the first definition.) Stress happens and it happens frequently in the lives of parents with young children.  We are told by medical experts that it is important to reduce the stress we have in our lives.  Too much stress can lead to high blood pressure, heart disease, lowered immune system, susceptibility to disease, stomach upset, ulcers, headaches, and decreased sex drive.

            In order to manage stress, we must first identify the sources of stress in our lives.  Many young parents are stressed by financial concerns, household responsibilities, marital difficulties, Childrens’ behavior problems, impossible work schedules, no time for friends, lack of sleep, or no time for fun, relaxation, and rest.

            After you have determined where your stress comes from, analyze the best way to deal with these stressful issues.  Your options may include changing the situation, seeking help, or changing yourself.  Financial problems can be addressed by consulting the advice of an accountant (and then following his advice).  Talking with your spouse about marital problems or seeking the help of a marriage counselor may help reduce marital difficulties and relieve the stress caused by relationship conflicts.  A family conference brainstorming ideas about how to share household responsibilities may result in a great stress relieving plan of action.  Pediatricians can help suggest tactics to deal with your childrens’ behavior or health problems.

            After you have analyzed how to best confront the situation causing stress you should put your plan into action.  In addition to your action plan, time tested techniques can be used to reduce stress.  For example: listen to relaxing music, watch a comedy on TV, get plenty of sleep, go for a walk, eat a well balanced diet, get a massage, talk with a friend, go to church, get a pet, take a mini-vacation or romantic get-a-way, organize the clutter in your home, take a bath, work out, tame your anger and worry, and cut yourself some slack.  Identify tactics and techniques that work for you to reduce your stress and then put them into practice. 

            No single idea or technique can magically relieve all the stress in your life. . . nor does every technique work equally well for everyone.  You must design a plan specifically suited to your life and your needs.  It’s worth the effort!!  The less stress you have the better parent, partner, and person you will be.